The nurse called and we have a plan. Matt will do his SA in the next day or so. If Matt is good to go we will have a chat with the OB for the next step. If he has issues he will go to the Urologist and while we are waiting for things to clear up continue to try.
The nurse felt there is more my OB can do at this point. She isn't referring me to the RE just yet. She thinks my OB will want to try IUI if Matt checks out ok. I guess we'll just have to wait and see...
Monday, January 25, 2010
On to Cycle 11.....
So AF came yesterday. I have nasty words for her but I'll save them for another time. I had been spotting for the past few days and it gradually got heavier until she came Sunday morning. As much as I was expecting it, it still hurts. A lot actually. But today is better. I must move forward.
I put in a call to my nurse just like the past 4 months to let her know AF came. I am anxious to hear the plan. It is getting more intense. Matt will go for his SA really soon so we can rule that out. I am asking to be referred to the RE for further testing/Lap. My OB has done all he can do.
It's that time....
I put in a call to my nurse just like the past 4 months to let her know AF came. I am anxious to hear the plan. It is getting more intense. Matt will go for his SA really soon so we can rule that out. I am asking to be referred to the RE for further testing/Lap. My OB has done all he can do.
It's that time....
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Finding My Happy Place
Where to start...
I am happily married with two beautiful daughters. I am very thankful for all that my life has been blessed with. I should be smack dag in the middle of my happy place....but I am not...yet.
Matt and I have decided we want to expand our family once more. He has Taylor who is 11 and together we have Lyla who is 2. I have always thought I would have 2 children and that I do now but I have a yearning to birth one more child. I cannot explain it. It is what it is.
Once we decided we did want one more child I had my IUD removed in April 2009 after having it for 18 mos. My doctor had me convinced that I would be fertile immediately. Ha! More on that later...I began charting as I did when we TTC the first time. I had high hopes it wouldn't take us but a few months at the most because that's how it happened with Lyla. Duh! (insert hair flip)
The first few months of charting and timing intercourse were fine. Although I soon began to realize it wasn't going to happen as easily as it had with Lyla. By Cycle 4 I had stressed myself out to the point that I decided to take a break from charting and relax a little. Well, once you understand that much about how your body works it is incredibly hard to just relax. Lol.
I decided after a 2 cycle break I needed to chart again for my sanity. I had thought I would become more sane not charting but it was only the opposite.
Lovely Cycle #7....oh how I loathe the.....this chart was UGLY. Temps all over the place. No real thermal shift. Up then down and up again. I seriously thought I had lost it at that point. I had a nagging feeling after the first few cycles that something wasn't right. I fought it for a while but after I came to the realization that I didn't ovulate in cycle 7 I decided it was time to give the OB a call. I was past due for a pap anyway.
I went in for my pap, charts in hand, to figure out what was happening with my body. I explained my concerns: 1) Wacky cycle 7 2) Recurrent spotting and short luteal phase (10-11 days) 3) Path forward - testing, etc. He explained that he suspected I had low progesterone so he sent me for CD21 testing. Further explained that if my P4 was fine we would do an HSG and then a SA for Matt.
CD21 rolls around and I get a call from the nurse that my progesterone level was 4.1. Lovely....I didn't ovulate. Now I understand why my chart was so whacked out. So they immediately put me on 50mg of Clomid to get me Oing telling me that a lot of women get pregnant on their first round. Pressure much???
Cycle 8 went perfectly as planned....almost. I Oed like I was supposed to and my P4 tripled from 4.1 to 15.5! I was on cloud 9. Maybe, just maybe I would be 'that' woman who gets pregnant on the first round. Fingers, toes, legs, everything was crossed! And then.......I began to spot. Spotting has never been a good sign for me. Some how I talked myself into every symptom being a pregnancy symptom. I refused to believe they could be AF symptoms too. Alas, I was not 'that' woman and AF came....I am thankful for ovulating and my LP was longer but still no baby. It hurt.
Fast forward to Cycle #10. (#9 had been identical as above with a P4 level of 30.7. BFN) I talked my nurse into an HSG if I wasn't pregnant after the 2nd round of clomid because (her words) SURELY I would be pregnant THIS time. Surely...she was incorrect again. I was quickly learning I would never again be 'that' woman to get pregnant the easy way. I had my turn with Lyla and it was someone else's now. I had to accept that.
I went in for my HSG very nervous because of the stories I had heard prior about the pain and cramping. I just knew though that this would be the answer to our problems. One or both of my tubs HAD to be blocked. This would fix it and we would go on our merry little way to having a baby. Not so...my tubes were all clear and the procedure was a piece of cake. I barely cramped at all. I did have to wait almost 3 hours for a 5 mins procedure but that's another story. Great news that my tubes weren't blocked but I still didn't have any answers. As glad I was to not have an problem I was frustrated at the same time.
We are now coming to a close of Cycle #10. I will know soon enough if I was pregnant or not. I am betting on not. Would I be 'that' woman I had heard many stories of getting pregnant the same cycle as HSG??? I'm not holding my breath...I have began to spot again and only time will tell what that means as I play dumb to numb my emotions.
I was told that if I am not pregnant this cycle I can switch over to the RE. I am not looking forward to that. I don't want to have to look infertility in the face. It's a mean mean thing. The plan will be for Matt to go for his SA. If his levels are good I will go in for a laproscopy. If I check out, I have no clue what it next. But then again that plan is up to the RE.
Matt and I have agreed that if it comes to having to shell out thousands and thousands of dollars to get pregnant then we won't.....sigh...that will be our ending point. We will never stop trying but it will resume on our own without medical assistance. That is hard to think about.
I struggle with where we are today and where we might have to go to get what we want. Will we ever get what we want? That is what this blog is supposed to help me with. I hope through this I can 'Find My Happy Place'. Whether it be with a newborn baby in my arms or with just my 2 beautiful girls. I don't know yet. I am not ready to give up trying....but...I do know that whatever happens I WILL end up finding my 'Happy Place'.
I have so much to be thankful for already.
I am happily married with two beautiful daughters. I am very thankful for all that my life has been blessed with. I should be smack dag in the middle of my happy place....but I am not...yet.
Matt and I have decided we want to expand our family once more. He has Taylor who is 11 and together we have Lyla who is 2. I have always thought I would have 2 children and that I do now but I have a yearning to birth one more child. I cannot explain it. It is what it is.
Once we decided we did want one more child I had my IUD removed in April 2009 after having it for 18 mos. My doctor had me convinced that I would be fertile immediately. Ha! More on that later...I began charting as I did when we TTC the first time. I had high hopes it wouldn't take us but a few months at the most because that's how it happened with Lyla. Duh! (insert hair flip)
The first few months of charting and timing intercourse were fine. Although I soon began to realize it wasn't going to happen as easily as it had with Lyla. By Cycle 4 I had stressed myself out to the point that I decided to take a break from charting and relax a little. Well, once you understand that much about how your body works it is incredibly hard to just relax. Lol.
I decided after a 2 cycle break I needed to chart again for my sanity. I had thought I would become more sane not charting but it was only the opposite.
Lovely Cycle #7....oh how I loathe the.....this chart was UGLY. Temps all over the place. No real thermal shift. Up then down and up again. I seriously thought I had lost it at that point. I had a nagging feeling after the first few cycles that something wasn't right. I fought it for a while but after I came to the realization that I didn't ovulate in cycle 7 I decided it was time to give the OB a call. I was past due for a pap anyway.
I went in for my pap, charts in hand, to figure out what was happening with my body. I explained my concerns: 1) Wacky cycle 7 2) Recurrent spotting and short luteal phase (10-11 days) 3) Path forward - testing, etc. He explained that he suspected I had low progesterone so he sent me for CD21 testing. Further explained that if my P4 was fine we would do an HSG and then a SA for Matt.
CD21 rolls around and I get a call from the nurse that my progesterone level was 4.1. Lovely....I didn't ovulate. Now I understand why my chart was so whacked out. So they immediately put me on 50mg of Clomid to get me Oing telling me that a lot of women get pregnant on their first round. Pressure much???
Cycle 8 went perfectly as planned....almost. I Oed like I was supposed to and my P4 tripled from 4.1 to 15.5! I was on cloud 9. Maybe, just maybe I would be 'that' woman who gets pregnant on the first round. Fingers, toes, legs, everything was crossed! And then.......I began to spot. Spotting has never been a good sign for me. Some how I talked myself into every symptom being a pregnancy symptom. I refused to believe they could be AF symptoms too. Alas, I was not 'that' woman and AF came....I am thankful for ovulating and my LP was longer but still no baby. It hurt.
Fast forward to Cycle #10. (#9 had been identical as above with a P4 level of 30.7. BFN) I talked my nurse into an HSG if I wasn't pregnant after the 2nd round of clomid because (her words) SURELY I would be pregnant THIS time. Surely...she was incorrect again. I was quickly learning I would never again be 'that' woman to get pregnant the easy way. I had my turn with Lyla and it was someone else's now. I had to accept that.
I went in for my HSG very nervous because of the stories I had heard prior about the pain and cramping. I just knew though that this would be the answer to our problems. One or both of my tubs HAD to be blocked. This would fix it and we would go on our merry little way to having a baby. Not so...my tubes were all clear and the procedure was a piece of cake. I barely cramped at all. I did have to wait almost 3 hours for a 5 mins procedure but that's another story. Great news that my tubes weren't blocked but I still didn't have any answers. As glad I was to not have an problem I was frustrated at the same time.
We are now coming to a close of Cycle #10. I will know soon enough if I was pregnant or not. I am betting on not. Would I be 'that' woman I had heard many stories of getting pregnant the same cycle as HSG??? I'm not holding my breath...I have began to spot again and only time will tell what that means as I play dumb to numb my emotions.
I was told that if I am not pregnant this cycle I can switch over to the RE. I am not looking forward to that. I don't want to have to look infertility in the face. It's a mean mean thing. The plan will be for Matt to go for his SA. If his levels are good I will go in for a laproscopy. If I check out, I have no clue what it next. But then again that plan is up to the RE.
Matt and I have agreed that if it comes to having to shell out thousands and thousands of dollars to get pregnant then we won't.....sigh...that will be our ending point. We will never stop trying but it will resume on our own without medical assistance. That is hard to think about.
I struggle with where we are today and where we might have to go to get what we want. Will we ever get what we want? That is what this blog is supposed to help me with. I hope through this I can 'Find My Happy Place'. Whether it be with a newborn baby in my arms or with just my 2 beautiful girls. I don't know yet. I am not ready to give up trying....but...I do know that whatever happens I WILL end up finding my 'Happy Place'.
I have so much to be thankful for already.
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